'Briefly set a new record for tallest human-made structure by getting my knit sweater snagged on the skydiving plane door as I jumped and not noticing until I'd landed.'

3059. "Water Damage"

'Your homeowner's insurance might cover it, but be sure to check the subductible.'

3060. "Omniroll"

'It seems wrong that Fruit by the Foot is only sold by weight or by number of rolls.'

3061. "Water Balloons"

'Update: The physics department has recruited an astronomer who studies meteor fireballs.'

3062. "Off By One"

'It does come at the small cost of a LOT more off-by-40-or-50 errors.'

3063. "Planet Definitions"

'Under the 'has cleared its orbital neighborhood' and 'fuses hydrogen into helium' definitions, thanks to human activities Earth technically no longer qualifies as a planet but DOES count as a star.'

3064. "Lungfish"

'I know having so many base pairs makes rebasing complicated, but you're in Bilateria, so shouldn't you at LEAST be better at using git head?'